Nightmare
by Amy Renee
Summary: Dean wants to tell Sam it will be okay, but his little brother is suffering from a pain Dean has never known and he doesn't know if saying that it's okay will make it so.


Set early in Season 1.

_Motel. 8:36 p.m._

Sam had practically collapsed on the bed as soon as they entered the room. He hadn't meant to fall asleep, at least not for very long, just until Dean had showered so he could grab one himself, but he was so tired. Somewhat grudgingly, he gave into his body's persistent demand.

Dean had come out of the bathroom in sweats and a t-shirt toweling his still-wet hair to find his younger sibling sprawled haphazardly on his stomach on the farther bed still clad in his jeans, sweatshirt and shoes. Sam's feet hung off the end of the bed.

The image caused a ghost of a smile to cross the elder's face. He knew his nightmare-plagued brother would be upset if he let him sleep but god the kid needed it. Dean pulled off Sam's shoes and draped a blanket from his own bed over his brother and let him sleep.

_11:43 p.m._

Dean is sitting at the small table on the laptop. Every now and then he steals a glance through the dim light at his sleeping brother across the room. Sam is laying on his side, back to him and thus far, seemingly sleeping without much of an issue. Maybe his kid brother will actually get a decent rest tonight. At this point, even a few hours are better than what he has been getting.

No sooner does he finish the thought when Sam's eyes open and he suddenly and frantically reaches his arm to the other side of the bed as he turns the rest of his body over after it.

"Jess!" he calls desperately as his hand comes down through air to touch nothing but the empty side of the bed. He could have sworn she had been right there, the urgent need to wake her, to warn her still reeling in him.

Dean looks up at him worriedly as he watches Sam's eyes soften with disappointment, relief, or maybe both, his mind coming back from that space between asleep and awake, between dream and reality, recognizing that it was just a dream.

Heart still racing, Sam slowly collapses on his stomach, still facing his brother's direction. His left arm snakes around and under the pillow at his head and he squeezes it somewhat tightly, as if it can offer some kind of comfort.

He can already feel the small wetness of tears at the corners of his eyes as he buries the lower half of his face in the crook of his elbow. His face is set like a stone, his eyes fixed. He's shaking a little.

Any other time he would shake it off so as to not outwardly display the impact of these events, but this time he doesn't make a full attempt to hide the emotion that he knows is visible enough for his older brother to see. He calms himself for the sake of himself but can't do much beyond that. He knows Dean can see him a few feet away and is worried about the sudden outburst and confusion.

Maybe he's seeking comfort. Maybe he's seeking comfort from his older brother, willing him to make the fear and the badness go away like he did the bad dreams and monsters in his head when they were kids. Maybe right now, he doesn't really care, because maybe this was too much.

"Sam?" Dean asks quietly, and Sam can hear the _Are you okay? _But it's more or less to let him know he's right there. Sam doesn't answer.

Dean walks over to the edge of the bed. It dips down as he sits on it in front of Sam. Turned slightly towards him, Dean reaches his right hand out and grips Sam's shoulder, squeezing gently, reaffirming him that he is there, that's it's alright now.

Sam suddenly pulls his upper body up and twists so he's facing Dean and wraps his arms around his neck, burying his face in the crook.

Dean is surprised by the gesture but doesn't resist it. Instead, he wraps his own arms around Sam's shoulders and back protectively and securely, his cheek against Sam's forehead. The embrace holds so much trust, confidence, and safety, and not just for Sam either.

Dean wants to tell Sam it will be okay, but his little brother is suffering from a pain Dean has never known and he doesn't know if saying that it's okay will make it so or offer any comfort right now. Instead he holds his breaking brother a little tighter, knowing that Sam will know what it means…


End file.
